MSA

Yesterday, I spent most of the day worrying and a part of the day in the hospital. My brother-in-law has multiple systems atrophy. It is a terminal form of MS that has an element of dimentia. He had two very severe seizures Tuesday night that set him back noticeably. His personality is changing. He and my sister have two elementary aged kids. She is in the slow process of losing her partner and the kids a father. I am so sad that it hurts. There is very little in the way of support for this family because of the age of my brother-in-law (51). There is enough help out there for elder people, but not for this type of illness/age group. She has her church family, her friends, and of course, her family. But not much in the way of other people who are simultaneously dealing with this disease. And as for my brother-in-law, I can't imagine the loneliness that he must feel.

I am sorry to post such a dark message on Valentines Day, the day of love, but I wanted to also talk about how I have observed my sister and her husband's love grow in spite of MSA. It has deepened. There is much more sharing and much more raw, unthreatened, uncompromised affection. There is more flexibility and understanding of needs. I am so in awe.
P.

Emily - My Daughter, My Sun

Today is Emily's birthday. The day that she turns 18. The day that she is recognized as an adult. I am filled with so many different emotions. I suspect that she is too. On this day, 18 years ago, my life changed forever. Emily's rich, beautiful personality entered into my life. One woman who admired Emily during our first outing together said that it would be a "total love affair." She was right. It has been and it is.

I write today not as a "goodbye" to Emily, but as a "thank you" and a "hello." Emily, thank you for pulling me from within myself. Time and time again, you reached out and got me to focus on something that was not within me. Time and time again, you pulled me to be part of what you were doing. You communicate with me, you share with me and you trust me. I have felt this from the start and have benefited from it more than I can tell you. Thank you for your humor during periods where there was not much to laugh about. Thank you for the love that you give to your brother and the care that you have always taken of him. Thank you for realizing that family has many different forms and for welcoming Mike into your life. Thank you for your compassion and the respect that you show to others in your life.

And, hello my Emily. Hello to you as an adult. As you reach out for what life has to offer you, your insight and intelligence will serve you well. You will have experiences that will separate you from me and others, but you will also have experiences that illustrate our commonalities. Have fun, keep your core within easy reach, and know that my love for you will not falter. I will be here for you if and when needed.

Happy 18th birthday. Love, Mom

Lots, lots and more lots going on!

Well, it has been a long time hasn't it? Lots of lots going on. Knitting is going well. I will be posting projects that I have been working on and projects that are completed shortly. My Mom gave (yes...gave!) me her camera, so I now have a decent method to photograph what I have been doing. I set a very ambitious goal for Christmas. Socks for all of our children (his and mine = 6) and several friends. I also knit a baby sweater, handwarmers and two hats. I started all of this during the month of October, plus a sweater. I am not done with the sweater - I had to rip it, rip it, rip it because the back turned out to be soooo big. Bummer, but what are ya gonna do? All of this knitting is making my hands and my wrists hurt. Apparently, I am a "picker." I need to be more aware of how tight I am holding my needles. I think that I am gripping as if my life depended on it. RELAX....yeah, right.

On the home front, my daughter turns 18 next week. I was signing forms for this school semester for her last night and I realized that these were probably the last forms that I would be required to sign. Wow. When did that happen? How? I will be posting for her birthday next week. My thoughts are a jumble right now, hopefully, I will get them together enough to communicate. What a journey.

Late night knit night tonight at Sow's Ear! I always love that. Also, daughter and I will be mainlining CSI Las Vegas. Really, really looking forward to the weekend.

Hope your's is great. Speak with you soon. P.

ShopVac

Well, mother nature in all of her glory has blessed our region with rain, rain, rain and more rain. Our basement is the recipient of a rather large portion of these gifts. Since Sunday, we have pumped out over 200 gallons of water, ripped out carpets, moved furniture and moped. It is still coming in. I am so sore. Not really from moving things, but from the shopvac activity. That has been my job. I finally figured out that the noise level could be reduced with ear plugs (how many years of education do I have?) and that if I stand at the bottom of the drainage area and vaccuum, I am likely to be more effective. I also came to understand one important problem with the shopvac. It was not designed by anyone that would ever use it. The thing is cumbersome, it falls apart everytime you have to move more than two feet, and is too short for all but the very small of us. Here is my solution: it should be redesigned to be ridden not pushed or pulled. The riding shopvac. What do you think? Can I retire early?

P.

Fun Places to Go

I was going through some rather recent photographs on my "thumb drive" and found this one. Husband and I went to the US Grand Prix in Indianapolis, IN this past July. It was hot, hot, hot. I am in the picture with the Loopy Ewe (you can find more information about him and vacations that he has participated in at http://www.loopyewe.com/). We had people seated quite snuggly against us and as I said, it was hot, hot, hot. Husband is a big F1 racing fan, so that is why we were there. Louis Hamilton won the race. It was very exciting even if we were dripping. On one of the breaks, I took my fold up chair down below the bleachers and finished up a lace shawl for my sister. I believe that I must have been the only attendee knitting lace (if not knitting period) that day. Racing is one of those things that I had no idea about until I met Husband. I enjoy watching him enjoying the race and recently realized that I am actually learning something about it.

Here are socks that I received at the end of May from a knit exchange pal that I hooked up with through yahoo. They are a perfect fit and I find that I wear them as often as I can. She did the socks in a toe-up fashion. The leg is in a k2, p1 rib. Very, very comfortable. The yarn is Sockotta (or something similar to that spelling). I found the yarn at Wisconsin Craft Market. Very reasonably priced. Since receiving these, I have made a second pair (slightly different color) with the same sort of pattern. I am looking forward to finding another sock exchange to be part of. Do you know of any? I have participated in 2 now and think that they are great fun.

I heard from Husband's sister today. His mother broke her rib and the discussions have begun about alternative living arrangements. Not a lot of choices, but hoepfully, this will add to the quality of her life.

P.

Transition

Husband and I were in MN this weekend visiting with his mother and other family members. We went because we received an email from his sister saying that his mother was down to 78 lbs. and was falling with regularity. Other family members were there. Lots of laughter and good eating was had by all, but underlying the weekend was the reality that in the very near future, a difficult coversation would be required. His mother can no longer stay on her own and does not want to live with a child. The county that she lives in does not have a middle ground, i.e., services available to help an elder stay in their home. What does a family do? Her ability to reason has been compromised due to malnutrition and the aging process. His sister is handling this with the aid of his mother's doctor. I have no doubt that at the end of the day, a good solution will be found, but the next several months will be difficult.


P.

Super Sockapalooza 4 Socks Received!!!

Look what I received from Dawn - my sockapalooza 4 pal....!! I came home from work last night and found this waiting for me. What a wonderful treat! The socks are so soft and fit perfectly and the treats were very yummy! The colorway of the sock yarn (Old Rose - Cherry Tree Hill) is made up of my favorite colors. Thank you, thank you Dawn!!

I went to Stitches Midwest last week for the first time. I am going to go next year. The classes were excellent and I was able to pick up 2 sweaters worth of an alpaca/wool blend at 25% off plus three skeins of STR yarn (no discount but really, really fun colors).

I continue to plug away at my KnitPicks socks. I couldn't in good faith "cut and run" because the sock will likely turn out ok. It is just not really fun to knit with. I am also working on a sweater from Knitting Pure and Simple that crosses over in the front. I am using a Knitpicks Merino sport weight wool in the charcoal colorway. I wear a fair amount of black during the winter so will likely wear this one quite often. The wool is very soft and the sweater is knitting up quickly. I think that I might knit this same sweater for my daughter. She is getting ready to have senior pictures taken. I am thinking something in a forrest green.

Speak with you soon. P.